Tennis shoe pimp and rock star wannabe Pharrell attempted to persuade a Paris McDonald's to open early recently by giving them a impromptu and unwanted mini-concert. I guess if Hammer could dance for popcorn chicken back in the day, this school teacher's son can humiliate himself for a couple of McNuggets. Although the money is probably long gone, at least Hammer got paid for his fast food shuffle.
Although he and his psuedo rock group, N*E*R*D, never appeared on Wavelength, the failed video show that inspired this blog, I did run into Skateboard P a couple times while doing business. The first time I saw him he was performing onstage at Flood Zone, a defunct Richmond nightspot. He and a couple of other guys were wearing matching flowered shirts and talking over a couple beats they had produced, Noreaga's "Superthug" and MC Lyte's "I Can't Make a Mistake." The crowd was polite but unimpressed. Later that evening, I was shooting Wavelength at another club when I was tapped on the shoulder.
"What's this?" he asked.
"I'm shooting my video show," I said.
"I want to be on this."
"Alright," I said and went back to setting up my shot.
"I want to be on this," he repeated.
"Well, you can't be on it right now," I said. "I'm shooting."
I guess the "P" doesn't stand for patience. He walked away from me and went on to become a successful producer and popular recording artist.